I don’t mean self absorbed, pompous and unreasonable. Those traits are reserved for spoiled little brats that suck the life out of people. No… selfish is a bit more reasonable and much healthier for you. Many of us worry too much about doing for others… making sure the kids get off to school… laundry’s done… groceries bought… reports are out… coffee’s made… you name it you’re doing it for someone else.
It’s time you start doing for yourself, become selfish. Worry about the things that make you happy and content. Yes you are allowed to be happy. Don’t let anyone tell you that you need to suffer in order to get rewarded because it really doesn’t work that way. I have suffered enough for the both of us and it didn’t get me anywhere. I believed that if i worked hard and sacrificed that I would be handsomely rewarded for my effort… really the only thing I got was frustration, failed relationships and financial flops. Now I’m not saying that there shouldn’t be a little sacrifice when attaining certain goals but it shouldn’t consume your life. Some sacrifice is good it builds character but it needs to benefit YOU not someone else.
I’ve been working on a TV pilot for a couple of months now and one of the participants for the show told me that he really wanted to lose weight this time. He’s way over 300 lbs. I explain that to lose the weight that there was going to have to be plenty of sacrifice on both of our parts. I was willing to come train him everyday for one hour six days a week for 10 weeks. I get paid $250 an hour…do the math that’s a little bit of a sacrifice on my part. The catch is that I had to drive to his house to train him…another half an hour both ways. Two hours every time I trained him. I was willing to do this because I wanted him to see the results that he needed and it was for the benefit of the TV show.
After the first week he lost the estimated eight pounds that I knew he would… awesome. Losing weight fast isn’t hard it’s just hard work. We were both very excited because it seemed like he was listening and would reach our goal of losing 30 lbs in thirty days easily. Boy was I wrong! The next week he decided it was a good idea to go out partying for the whole weekend and eat like shit…which realy isn’t that bad if you are exercising. I come to find out that the first week he was able to take off from his second job to shoot most of the TV Pilot but the second week he had to go back to work. Now he didn’t have the “time” to do the second workout that is required under my Lose 30 in Thirty Program. The workout is literally 20 minutes long, not a huge sacrifice but an important component in the program. Especially if you want to lose weight fast. His excuse was that since he had to wake up early in the morning if he worked out at night he couldn’t get to sleep because he suffers from exercise induced insomnia. O.K., so what! It’s for 10 weeks and the reward is huge!
Now he’s asking me to put forth an effort of losing $500.00 a day and he can’t get a 20 minute workout done. I illustrate this point because so many of us do this for other people and all we get is the same frustration and no reward. I decided that week that there must be other people out there willing to do what needed to be done to escape their prison of fat. In 10 weeks he would have lost over 60 lbs on my program and he couldn’t get his priorities straight. So I dropped him… like a hot rock. He’s still fat and I’m $30,000 dollars richer.
Sometimes we have to look at the situation and see if that sacrifice is going to bring us the rewards we seek. If after the second week it doesn’t look promising then cut your losses and move on. If within the first two weeks there are red flags then there will be more red flags and eventual abandonment of the situation. Staying in something just because you think it’s the right thing to do is not only idiotic it is life sucking. It is your life…do things that will benefit you and when you feel happy and productive in your life than you will be a real benefit to others.
A little side note: After I canned my TV client I was able to use those prime time hours to help fellow fitness professionals with their business branding and website marketing. I was helping so many others and still getting a reward for the effort I was putting out. Totally win-win.